Straight into my top ten tips, this one.

With the sub-para, to never order fish and chips in a pub, they (in general) aren't equipped to cook 'em like a proper chip shop.(*)



(*) The only exception I have come across was The Rockingham Arms in Towton.

My now ex-bother in law used to tell me "never get married". What he should have said was "never marry your sister" - sound advice on many levels.



And, he's on his third marriage now.

Never eat seafood while travelling.



Never eat a McDonalds before getting on a plane to Singapore.

You can only p!ss with the cock you've got.

A former colleague of mine told me "never trust a man who wears grey shoes" and he was right!

You can talk to a man with a wooden leg, but you can't talk to one with a wooden head.



If you can't P155 up tall trees don't try running with the big dogs.



Those who don't do their paperwork properly end up with a dirty @rse.



Words of wisdom from an old boss of mine.



My favourite ones are are "you get what you pay for", "beggars can't be choosers" and "worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair, it keeps you busy but it doesn't get you anywhere".

Shiny shoes



Happy feet

I wouldn't have trusted [iThe Gray Man[/i (Albert Fish) either.

Invest in decent shoes and a decent bed.

When you're not in one, you're usually in the other.

Try not to fart in your local.



[urlhttp://tulsatrot.travellerspoint.com/58/[/url

Wise words I have educated my Brother in Law with;



"Sometimes say nothing"

1) Never eat anything that you can't pronounce.



2) When out on an all-day sesh, never drink anything with an ABV above 5 %, as this will mean you going hungry (see #1)