A jewish man applies for a season ticket at wigan but was turned down on account he was circumcised.... apparently you have to be a complete knob to support them

A man goes to he doctors and says :

"Doctor , Doctor , My D**k is shaped like a rocket"

The Doctor asks , "What does your wife think ?"

The Man reples "Oh shes over the moon"

A cake decorations manufacturer is having to cut the number of staff due to the credit crunch. Hundreds and thousands are at risk.

Bloke goes into a chemist 3 condoms miss he says,

Dont miss me the assistant says,

ok says the man better make it 4......



Bloke goes into a chemist 3 condoms please,

any particular colour says the assistant,

Red,white and blue,he says.........









He goes back in several months later,

Can i have a maternity bra please,

what bust said the assistant?

the blue one ,came the reply..









Why do women rub their eyes when they get out of bed in a morning????







cos they hav nt got any bollox to scratch..

When Kermit the frog heard about swine flu, he regretted having sex with Miss Piggy without protection, what a ing Muppet.

Two fish sat on a perch,



One says to the other, " can you smell fish"??

dont know wether these have been said cos i cba reading through all 14 pages...



hows does micheal jackson pick his nose



from a catalogue

Whats the difference between Janet Jackson and the England cricket team?



Janet Jackson will be taking the ashes home this summer.

whats the difference between micheal jackson and alex ferguson



fegie will be palying giggs this august

What do you call a man with three balls?



a juggler

Did you ever hear about the boy who cried Wolf?







He was masturbating over Gladiators.

I met a 14-year-old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, sexy and flirty, so I suggested we meet up. She turned out to be an undercover cop. How cool is that at her age?

Why was Cinderella so lousy at baseball? Who could blame her, she had a pumkin for a coach and was always running from the ball

why would and indeed HOW could 2 fish sit on a perch???









Try the same joke but with 2 birds

Why do seagulls fly over Wigan upside down



Because its not worth sh#ting on

Isn't a perch a type of fish? Isn't that the joke?

it is, but he got the set up wrong, why would two fish be sat on a perch?

Michael Shields has said he's sick of being surrounded by theives, drug dealers and murderers...... He's only been home for a couple of days!!

How does a Wigan lass turn the light on after sex?





























She opens the car door.

No i messed up, he is right it is ment to be the two BIRDS sat on a perch one says to the other can you smell fish but i messed up so it dosent matter

The Jackson 5 are coming back,



20% off all tickets

What kind of Bee's make milk....





Boobies

Terrible

What do you say to a Wiganer in a job?



Big Mac, large frys please