Is there any food-related issue worse than other people's barbeques? I propose a barbeque licence, whereby men (because it's usually men who suddenly become expert chefs when the sun comes out) have to undergo training in basic cookery and smoke control before they qualify.
Crap burgers, burned or raw meat, paper plates, nowhere to sit or put your drink while you try to gnaw a chewy Asda steak in a wretched white bun.
I am sure a satisfactory barbeque is theoretically possible but the only one I have ever attended and truly enjoyed was on a beach in Martinique where there were tables and cutlery to enjoy the delicious mountain crayfish. Oh, and one in Madeira, not on a beach but similarly supplied with seating, tables and cutlery to eat (in this instance) char-grilled fillets of Espada (a type of white fish).
British barbeques are, not always but usually, rubbish.
Freedom without Socialism is privilege and injustice. Socialism without freedom is slavery and brutality.
Joined: Nov 23 2009 Posts: 12805 Location: The Hamptons of East Yorkshire
El Barbudo wrote:Is there any food-related issue worse than other people's barbeques? I propose a barbeque licence, whereby men (because it's usually men who suddenly become expert chefs when the sun comes out) have to undergo training in basic cookery and smoke control before they qualify.
Crap burgers, burned or raw meat, paper plates, nowhere to sit or put your drink while you try to gnaw a chewy Asda steak in a wretched white bun.
I am sure a satisfactory barbeque is theoretically possible but the only one I have ever attended and truly enjoyed was on a beach in Martinique where there were tables and cutlery to enjoy the delicious mountain crayfish. Oh, and one in Madeira, not on a beach but similarly supplied with seating, tables and cutlery to eat (in this instance) char-grilled fillets of Espada (a type of white fish).
British barbeques are, not always but usually, rubbish.
Well the belly-pork I've just dined on with some buttered Jersey spuds and chilli salad was magnifique.
Joined: Nov 23 2009 Posts: 12805 Location: The Hamptons of East Yorkshire
El Barbudo wrote:That sounds delicious. Needs cutlery and seating though.
Only the pair of us sat on some pleasant garden furniture with some real plates and Sheffield steel forks and knives. The wine was cr@p but we still managed to slurp 5 bottles of dry white down between us.
WIZEB wrote:Only the pair of us sat on some pleasant garden furniture with some real plates and Sheffield steel forks and knives. The wine was cr@p but we still managed to slurp 5 bottles of dry white down between us.
Five? Between two of you? I'd be lying in the garden in a puddle of my own p'ss on two and a half bottles of wine.
Christianity: because you're so awful you made God kill himself.
Joined: May 10 2002 Posts: 47951 Location: Die Metropole
El Barbudo wrote:Is there any food-related issue worse than other people's barbeques? I propose a barbeque licence, whereby men (because it's usually men who suddenly become expert chefs when the sun comes out) have to undergo training in basic cookery and smoke control before they qualify.
Crap burgers, burned or raw meat, paper plates, nowhere to sit or put your drink while you try to gnaw a chewy Asda steak in a wretched white bun.
I am sure a satisfactory barbeque is theoretically possible but the only one I have ever attended and truly enjoyed was on a beach in Martinique where there were tables and cutlery to enjoy the delicious mountain crayfish. Oh, and one in Madeira, not on a beach but similarly supplied with seating, tables and cutlery to eat (in this instance) char-grilled fillets of Espada (a type of white fish).
British barbeques are, not always but usually, rubbish.
The man in question is tb, and he learnt how to do a braai out in SA.
El Barbudo wrote:Is there any food-related issue worse than other people's barbeques? I propose a barbeque licence, whereby men (because it's usually men who suddenly become expert chefs when the sun comes out) have to undergo training in basic cookery and smoke control before they qualify.
Crap burgers, burned or raw meat, paper plates, nowhere to sit or put your drink while you try to gnaw a chewy Asda steak in a wretched white bun.
I am sure a satisfactory barbeque is theoretically possible but the only one I have ever attended and truly enjoyed was on a beach in Martinique where there were tables and cutlery to enjoy the delicious mountain crayfish. Oh, and one in Madeira, not on a beach but similarly supplied with seating, tables and cutlery to eat (in this instance) char-grilled fillets of Espada (a type of white fish).
British barbeques are, not always but usually, rubbish.
WIZEB wrote:Only the pair of us sat on some pleasant garden furniture with some real plates and Sheffield steel forks and knives. The wine was cr@p but we still managed to slurp 5 bottles of dry white down between us.
Ah, now that sounds more like alfresco dining than the sort of barbeque I'm talking about.
Freedom without Socialism is privilege and injustice. Socialism without freedom is slavery and brutality.
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