took him long enough ball bag.....

Two Irish blokes walk into a pub eating sandwhiches.

Barman says "sorry, lads, you can't eat your own food in here"

So they swap butties

There were 3 slaves, an Aussie, a Chinese and an Irishman.

Their master pointed to a pile of sand and said, "Aussie man, you're in charge of shovelling this sand. Irishman you are in charge of scraping up the leftovers and Chinese man you are in charge of the supplies."

An Hour later the master came back and said "Why haven't you shovelled the sand?" The Aussie and the Irishman said "Because the Chinese man didn't give us any supplies." Just then the Chinese man jumped out of the hole in the sand and said "Surplise!"

What do you call a gonad who applies for Mr Warrington and quite obviously has a split personality disorder ?

K heres some more folks

The definition of a loser? a man with a hard on who walks into a wall and busts his nose

A group of chess enthusiasts are at a tournament, and are gathered in the hotel reception area telling each other about their best games, when the hotel manager comes and throws them all out.
Why? "I don't like chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

two slags talking one says ;

have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?
no says the other but ive been swung round by mi tits............

2 chicken pies in a beer garden... 1 says to the other are u up for a chicken pie???? the other 1 says chicken pie

WTF ????

Double post