Wise man.

Although my two visits to Akbars didn't yield food that was too great either. Still, at least it had nice cutlery, funky lighting and pints of Kingfisher for pissed up whiteys with more money than sense.

Having said that, I went to Mumtaz on Friday dinner, taking my eldest daughter, and spending £33!

Appetisers - she wanted poppadoms, so we had two of them plus the pickles. The pickles were mixed - some very nice ones but others that were just jam. Poppadums were spiced but small, thin and slightly oily. 5/10

Starters - she had chicken boti and I had some grilled prawns. The chicken was surprisingly nice and the prawns were gorgeous (fresh). Prawns were £5.85 for 3 feckin prawns though! 10/10 for taste, but including cost 6/10.

Mains - I had vegetable karahi. It was ok but a bit too 'designer' for my liking: uniformly sliced batons of carrot, courgette and potato in a light sauce. I asked for some dall to be added and for it to be hot - presumably the waiter forgot to write down either request but it did look pretty. Daughter had chicken karahi which we asked to be mild (and it was - very mild). Chicken was plentiful but some pieces were pretty tough. The chicken had been cooked properly so not sure why. It was all bland breast meat - none of the far more tasty leg meat. She liked it though. 5/10.

Salad - probably the best bit. A big bowl of tomato, red onion, lettuce and cucumber. 8/10

Rotis - Tasted ok but not much bigger or thicker than chapatis. 4/10

Clientele was mainly Asian suits along with a group of whitey blokes and a table full of people who looked like they worked at the uni or for the council who were celebrating a birthday. The lad nearest me in the latter group ordered a big plate of chips (along with an individual jar of 'Mumtaz ketchup' and his curry which he tipped on top. He'd have loved Akbars - he could have had 8 pints of Kingfisher first so he could properly appreciate his 'curry'.

Other recent experiences...

Went to Karachi a couple of weeks ago. Very nice. I had my usual vegetable & dall main with 2 gorgeous rotis and onion bhaji starter. Stuffed for £5.40 - compare and contrast with Mumtaz.

Went to Omars last weekend. It was ok but definitely a new chef on. My chicken and keema was ok but I'd asked for it 'hot' and got mild. Daughter's Punjabi chicken was glowing red and didn't taste anything like previous ones. Salad had cooked peas and sweetcorn in it

Chilli Chicken has a definite 'Specially prepared by the chef for vexed up clueless whiteys' feel to it. Wouldn't touch a dish like that with a barge pole. Anywhere.

Karachi is a bargain price-wise and pretty good fare.

You ought to try the Kashmir next time. Don't listen to Bullseye and VBFG either... they're either clueless about the Kashmir or harbour some kind of irrational agenda against the place. I went last Friday and it was pretty good. My stomach wasn't feeling too great beforehand, so I played it safe and just ordered a Chicken Masala. A few pieces of chicken were a tad rubbery but the rest was fine - 7/10.

Onion Bhaji starter was excellent, tasty and plentiful and at just 80p an absolute bargain - 7.5/10.

The Roti's were also excellent at 40p each - one and a bit was enough for me.

Side salad just like it is at the Karachi... tomato, onion and cucumber with the acccompanying mint yoghurt sauce.

Total cost for the lot? £6



Oh dear... that's not good news. The last curry I had there was OK but I was starving. My last 3 or 4 visits there have certainly not been as good as in the past though.



Dan's favourite dish at Omars that

Went to Nirmals in Sheffield last night, my Chicken Madras was pretty good if a little too much sauce, rotis were good quality and so were the kebabs for starters. Bloody cheap n'all, £7.50 a head more or less.

The porcelain carnage has begun

I love the place and want it to be the best, it's the first curry house that I thought of myself as a regular in. Trouble is it has sucked everytime I've been in for the last fifteen years.

I veto any place where the smell of pi55 coming out of the bogs is stronger than the food I'm eating.

I was taken to Bibi's overpriced place in Leeds Christmas before last, as a bribe by a consultant. We were plonked next to the bogs, which stunk as bad as the Karachi used to. The cost of that meal would have kept me in Bradford curries for a year.

No wonder you've been going so long then. How much are the 'extras'?

Two 'out of town' experiences last week, one good and one woeful.

On Wednesday I went to see the GB vs France U-18s game which meant skipping tea and getting a takeaway on the way home. I stopped off at the 'Home Indian' in Hipperholme. Big mistake. I decided to play safe and go for something veggie with rice, ordering a 'dall dopiaza' with plain rice.

The rice was like American long grain (3/10) and the 'DD' was plain weird - dall in a tomatoey sauce with lumps of tinned pinapple and no onion. Uneatable and 0/10.

On Saturday I took the family to the Golden Bengal in Horsforth Leeds. Its a small unassuming looking place thats been their many years (as the Golden Gate') but was gutted and reopened by the same owner as the Golden Bengal about 18 months ago. Its got a kind of a homely whitey feel to it, with faux trendy decor, a bar and a big window along one wall into the kitchen. A sort of middle class, suburban whitey place.

We skipped starters but did have some poppadoms and pickles as they keep the kids quiet. Poppadoms were fresh and dry (8/10) and the pickles were good too (8/10), espescially the fresh onion chutney which was lovely.

For the main dishes we had:

A chicken tikka main dish which was served with fried onions and peppers. This was essentially for the eldest but we all shared a bit. It was very pleasant and scored a respectable 8/10.

A chicken massala, again very nice, with the chicken all being good quality and it being really nicely spiced. 8/10.

Chicken something or other naga. Billed as being hot and sour it didn't dissapoint. Again the chicken was excellent and the sauce was really nice. 9/10.

As acompaniments we had a pilau rice (delicatelycooked, all the grains good and seperate 9/10), a naan bread (a relative dissapointment as it seemed a bit 'heavy' and they usually do better, 5/10), 2 side salads (fresh and varied, 8/10) and a mixed vegetable side dish (this was superb, all fresh vegetables in a spicy, garlicky sauce 10/10).

We also commited to the full whitey experience with 2 Bangra lagers, 3 fruit juices, a tea, a coffee, and 2 ice creams for the kids. We were rewarded with the whitey staples of hot flannels to wipe our hands and a sweetie each with the bill (the latter having full whitey padding coming in at £53).

You'd struggle to afford to go there regularly but for a one off its a good place as the food is very fresh and noticeably different to elsewhere - with the place billing itself as offering 'Bengali cuisine'. Watching the chefs chopping ingrediants and cooking breads was pretty interesting too.

Hard to quantify really, I paid in roadkill.

Anyhoo, upcoming events:

1) bullterrier's birthday (13th March)
2) Asim's birthday (errr, about the same time)
3) The Catalans game and fostering cross border relations with the good people of Le Hudds de Field. (ar5e end of March)

One, some or all of therse merit curry. What say you, curry fans?

Near enough my birthday. So yes.