Did your slave do the barbequeing or is she too mentally fragile to be left near open heat with a pair of tongs?

Apparently not, Blythman quizzed some woman from SeaFish about this and she was comfortable with the four different types and didn't think the consumers were being fooled.

The various descriptions of scampi only cover retail, restaurants are not covered and can name what they like as scampi

No, the Polish au pair.

I hope you're paying her minimum wage at least?

Internship.

Why is it my opinion is always "whinging", in your opinion?

Anyway, FOOD....

as we're going down this route, would I be right in thinking that, in the 80's, Scampi was actually substituted by monkfish bits, because nobody would buy monkfish?

Until the celebrity chefs got on the bandwagon, the biggest commercial market for UK landed monkfish was fishmeal. It was considered too much messing around and too much waste. my cousins and uncles used to bring the tails to my old man and we'd skin it, remove the membrane and eat it, either battered and deep-fried or pickled. It was always known as poor man's lobster and was often used to bulk up chowders etc.

There is no such fish as a monkfish, it is a generic term for Angler fish or Angel shark (two completely separate species). If it's cut into 5cm x 2cm pieces and you pour boiling water over it, it curls just like scampi tail. Mind you, you can achieve the same effect with dogfish too

Yup, you're spot on on that score.

It's a bit like the labelling issue with horse meat: nothing wrong with horse meat per se, but people should be able to trust what's on a packet - or buy something that isn't in a packet/pre-made.

Isn't it illegal to sell Angel Shark as Monkfish in the UK?

In the scampi stakes, I can't remember the last time I ordered scampi in a restaurant or saw it on a "proper" restaurant menu come to that ... I reckon the confusion over what it is/was or should be has pushed it down to frozen bar-meal fodder.
I can remember ordering Monkfish though.

I have only twice knowingly eaten shark, once was Scarborough woof, that was bloody awful and had a really strong "fishy" flavour ... and once was just generically called "shark" ... that one was a little more meaty, like a watery version of halibut in texture, as though it had been frozen and not properly cooked.
Possibly experiences that should be put down to poor chef-fing, I don't know, but enough to put me off.