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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 12:00 am 
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Derwent wrote:Ben Elton got it spot on in Chart Throb where he says the contestants are categorised into 4 categories :-

Mingers - those who are utterly desperate, there to be laughed at, will do whatever is asked of them on stage
Clingers - the 'needy' ones who 'want this so much', often with a sad back story
Blingers - those convinced of their own greatness despite having achieved nothing
Singers - those who can actually sing but who also need to fall into one of the other categories too

The ideal X Factor contestant is someone who exhibits overlapping traits of all 4 categories.


This is the way I respond to the X factor / britains got no talent shows

I love Bens writing style , picking on modern culture and then setting funny,interesting usually in a thriller or murder mystery , my favourite was the Big Brother one , 12 contestants , 26 cameras , 34 microphones , 1 murder and nobody knows who dun nit :wink: , fantastic






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SOMEBODY SAID that it couldn’t be done
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it!

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 12:27 pm 
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Briefly taking X Factor seriously for a second...

Who in the name of holy hell is voting for Frankie and/or Janet? They are both horrendous. It's bad enough they got to the live finals. Wagner was ten times better than either of them. Even CHICO was better.






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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 12:39 pm 
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Fishsta wrote:Briefly taking X Factor seriously for a second...

Who in the name of holy hell is voting for Frankie and/or Janet? They are both horrendous. It's bad enough they got to the live finals. Wagner was ten times better than either of them. Even CHICO was better.


To be fair to Janet she can sing certain songs very well with her cute Irish twang.

Frankie is just being voted for by the 7-17 year old girls who fancy him. It's safe to write the whole series off, there is no real talent on it.

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 1:53 pm 
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Janet is and will be an excellent singer of the limited range of songs which suit her quirky vocal style. As well as that individual style, she also has the sort of Irish ingenue image which they will use to flog folksy compilations. Frankie OTOH genuinely doesn't have any redeeming feature that I can see, he can't sing a note and already looks like a 40-year-old accountant being attacked about the head by a Maine Coon.

The essential answer is that in pop, the packaging is probably at least twice as important as the product, and before they grow out of it and say "what was I thinking", Frankie has the support of enough inbetweenies, and presumably the Cats Defence League, to stay in the comp in the short term.

Still, nobody will beat the inimitable Johnny :D






Last edited by Ferocious Aardvark on stardate Jun 26, 3013 11:27 am, edited 48,562,867,458,300,023 times in total

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 3:17 pm 
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Saddened! wrote:To be fair to Janet she can sing certain songs very well with her cute Irish twang.

Frankie is just being voted for by the 7-17 year old girls who fancy him. It's safe to write the whole series off, there is no real talent on it.


NO SHE CAN'T. She can't sing in tune. If she was 6 years old, yes, maybe it would be "cute", but still you'd only tell her she's "good" because she'd be "6", and telling a six year old, "Actually, you know what, you're absolute crud, give it up" is, for some reason, considered socially unacceptable.

I wonder if these girls would still fancy Frankie after he'd infected them with some kind of unpleasant STD? If a woman had taken Amelia Lily into an underground car-park, followed by another unknown blonde less than 2 hours later for "hanky-panky", she'd be branded a slut/slag/slapper/something else beginning with "sl".

This series is a bit of a write-off though. As an avid fan year on year, I'm finding myself increasingly thinking "meh".

Mark this moment... we actually agree on something. Blimey.

Ferocious Aardvark wrote:Janet is and will be an excellent singer of the limited range of songs which suit her quirky vocal style.


Maybe. They're called "Nursery Rhymes".

Quote:As well as that individual style, she also has the sort of Irish ingenue image which they will use to flog folksy compilations. Frankie OTOH genuinely doesn't have any redeeming feature that I can see, he can't sing a note and already looks like a 40-year-old accountant being attacked about the head by a Maine Coon.


ROFLMAO. No, really, that's what I'm doing. I'll prove it later.

Quote:The essential answer is that in pop, the packaging is probably at least twice as important as the product, and before they grow out of it and say "what was I thinking", Frankie has the support of enough inbetweenies, and presumably the Cats Defence League, to stay in the comp in the short term.

Still, nobody will beat the inimitable Johnny :D


I actually like Johnny. I mean, we all know he was this years novelty act, but he's actually pretty good. Meanwhile I can't stand Kitty... but, aside from her terrible performance of Who Wants To Live Forever in week 1, I can't deny she's actually very good. Craig blew me away in week 1 (Jar of Farts), but has gone downhill to merely "safe" performances... good enough, but not show-stopping.

TBH, I think the most consistently decent act has been "Misha B", if you forget about the rapping and dafter haircuts than Sean Long.






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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 3:38 pm 
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Disappointed HaBABEis went on Sunday, but to be honest she's been poor for the live shows.

I thought Kitteh was the best surprisingly. Although she does have a tendency to shout rather than sing - can't deny there's never a dull moment when she's on stage and I'm actually warming to her in some of the pre-performance video diary things.

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2011 10:46 pm 
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Adamjk wrote:Disappointed HaBABEis went on Sunday, but to be honest she's been poor for the live shows.

I thought Kitteh was the best surprisingly. Although she does have a tendency to shout rather than sing - can't deny there's never a dull moment when she's on stage and I'm actually warming to her in some of the pre-performance video diary things.

What is it with her and her bum cheeks?
''Look half my ass is hanging out folks ... I have the sagging ass of a seventy year old.''






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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 2:32 pm 
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For anyone who cares, it seems that little scrote Frankie Coconuts has been kicked off the show.

From what I saw of him he'll struggle to get anywhere with such a poor voice, and will probably survive for a little while on this lame rock n' roll character he's been desperately creating, before slipping back into obscurity.

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 2:49 pm 
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Sounds like a cue for giving Johnny a reprieve to me . . . otherwise they are one week short of acts






Last edited by Ferocious Aardvark on stardate Jun 26, 3013 11:27 am, edited 48,562,867,458,300,023 times in total

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 Post subject: Re: X factor 2011
PostPosted: Tue Nov 08, 2011 3:41 pm 
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